When I wrote something about libido it was only the beginning and now, why do we get infatuated? What made a person get so infatuated with someone? How does one person differentiate this feeling from love?
These are questions are we cannot simply answer in one sitting.
When infatuation gets a hold of you, you better pray that it won’t last long because if it lasts longer than a week you could be obsessed or in lust. Best case scenario is you could just be in love and luckily your love expressed is reciprocated.
Infatuation is defined as the intense but short-lived passion, feeling even admiration for someone or something. From what I know, most people are infatuated for someone than something. One example is when someone gets invited by his or her friend to a party and your friend introduced you to someone you have never met before (of course) and that person is truly fond of music, sports and art like you.
After you were introduced to that person you were left tongue-tied, stunned and speechless for what the person looked like or the way the person was dressed then you ask your friend if the person is in a relationship and when your friend says that the person is not in a relationship you go wild in your head but since you have only met the person the first time you would keep a low profile and keep it cool then go crazy when you get home. In the succeeding days you would definitely look for the person on any social media outlet known to man.
I do not really believe in love-at-first-sight because our world is not a recycled soap opera or a chick lit that gets a movie adaptation every time. Giving someone the ideal look of the person they want to be in love is a form of infatuation for me and the places you see in these adaptations or even TV ads also leads someone to infatuation because of the feeling that they want to feel it too so desperately.
I’ve been infatuated more than once and luckily I did not get infatuated with someone within the four corners of our school well I really did. I got infatuated with one of my co-majors when I was still donning the old psychology uniform. I did not get infatuated with her that much because we belong in different social classes. She was also this girl who’s always after a guy to keep her sane but not really get hooked with the guys in our classes. That really sets us apart.
One person that really got me infatuated in our school was someone who was being paired with one of my friends during our freshman year but he didn’t care about it because she was not my friend’s type so instead of him getting interested, I got interested with the person.
According to my friends, I was so infatuated with the person that one time we were in my friend’s place for an overnight stay to finish our experiment and paper for biology, I was screaming her name out loud that I woke up everyone in their household.
I did not held on to my feelings because she was not studying within the realm of my previous major and she’s very outgoing while I’m this introvert still conscious about my grades. What kept me hooked was that she had fair skin and I thought she was that tall but she was only wearing heels.
Like libido or any terminal disease in my previous posts, it does not choose its victims and it takes place simultaneously.
Infatuation could take place even at a entrance exam of a big university because I remember getting infatuated in this university after picking up this person’s folder which for many would consider as sparks if they did get to see it but if they were not so busy thinking of the exam everyone would go crazy about it.
Luckily I didn’t get to pass the entrance exam because if I did, I would definitely go crazy to look for the person. Lucky for me the infatuation only lasted an hour after I took the entrance exam.
Another important reason on why I’m happy that I did not pass that entrance exam is that I can’t swim the big waters there when it rains hard and I do not have the proper boots to conquer those waters even if my house is just a couple of blocks away from that school.
Another is someone feeling inspired because they are seated to someone who could really turn everyone’s head making everyone motivated to pass that entrance exam is infatuation. Even if you did not take those review classes for those entrance exams you would really feel smart because you are driven by someone. You could not wait to pass the exam, have yourself enrolled and wear their uniform so you can look the person in that university.
The worst occasion to be infatuated I must say is prom night. Prom night for me is that one event in a school year where you suddenly get noticed because on a ordinary school day you’re girl or boy who looks like Jon Heder in Napoleon Dynamite or Rachael Leigh Cook in She’s All That. Of course if you’re a girl you’re not yet Rachael Leigh Cook who got the makeover before Freddie Prinze, Jr. came to your house to pick you up.
Getting infatuated on prom night gives you the feels and when you get back to reality, you would be lucky if you don’t go crazy after prom night towards the person and you guys just met on prom night.
Neither of you guys asked each other out.
Another occasion that you should not get infatuated are culminating events when you’re in college because I remember dressing up like the great Dolphy since we were required to wear white and it was the only get up I know to look good with a rented white coat and white pants just from my psychology uniforms. The infatuation part came when someone asked me for a photo op. I didn’t get to see the photo circulate online but she sure was looking good with that blue gown. I didn’t push through with my feelings because for one thing I don’t really know how I’m going to approach her since she is a year ahead of our batch.
The worst part of infatuation is ASSUMING THAT LOVE but the person is not really into you.
Just imagine a guy who thinks too much of himself and he sees himself as a heartthrob after three semesters of college. What’s even worse is that this person is studying a program in which he is surrounded by douche bags and girls full of themselves before he shifted to a program that does not have so much practical exams.
I really feel sorry for this guy because he thought he can court then date two girls at the same time and he is blinded by the infatuation that he feels.
So much pity on this person a couple of months back because he is so infatuated that he conspired with some of our friends and one professor so he could throw this surprise party and look romantic before her classmates. It was so pathetic that he wasted money for the cake, the pizza and flowers that day just to make her feel special when he could have just treat our gang a huge pizza. Too bad for him because the girl that he likes prefers a guy that looks bad-ass like Jason Statham or Ed Skrein, the actor who played Ajax/Francis in Deadpool.
DON’T GET ME STARTED ON WHAT HE DID ON VALENTINE’S DAY AND THEY WILL SAY THAT I’M THIS DELUSIONAL S-O-B WITH MY HEAD UP HIGH.
Infatuation is not always bad because some of the people that I know still get infatuated and they do not go head over feet or head over heels towards someone.
Some people even call it happy crush in which you get to like someone and you are just happy that the person completes your day. You’re just more than happy to see the person even if you are not really expressing the feelings that you really have because you are content with just seeing her and also be part of their company.
In getting infatuated, a good place to get infatuated for me are book stores or books shops because you would only glance at the person buying a book trying to look hipster and be done with it because after buying a book you won’t see the person after that. Then you read the book that you just bought for yourself.
I’m truly amazed with the people who can be infatuated but do not fall for the person because they are so occupied with a lot of things regardless whether it is school or work keeping them occupied. I wish I could be more occupied so I can keep myself away infatuation.
As for good-looking clerks it’s only in movies that you get to see a clerk looking like Meg Ryan before the Botox and be in love after exchanging of emails and chatting under your user names or looking each other up on Facebook and it rarely happens. Not to mention Hugh Grant in Notting Hill.
As for buying books, you should not be buying one of those books teaching you how to hook up because those kinds of books just keeps you fixated in getting that girl or boy that you know is light years away and making you look so desperate to other people. But if you’re just buying it to at least step up your game then it’s fine. Just make sure you have a condom with you if you’re about to get it on. The worst are those books saying why are you still that single and hopeless romantic person among your friends which does not really help making someone feel so bad about themselves and I wish I could name some of those authors but man I can’t because I follow them on Twitter and they also provide a little inspiration with my writing.
Getting infatuated is easy because your unconscious makes it easy for you to get infatuated. Getting yourself out of that feeling is hard because you are trying your best to get rid of the person in your head. It’s harder when you get to see each other every day in school or work because urges can really make someone crazy. I’m saying getting out because letting go are for those people who really got themselves in a relationship.
In getting out, there are things that you must be sure about. First is burning that bridge. You must be sure that you will no longer text each other, tag them in any social media outlet and even stalk each other because you are burning that bridge. As for blocking the person, it’s optional. You can block the person but make sure you do it in the dead of night. More important is lessen the hours spent on social media because it’s not in social media that you can really find someone new.
Second is make yourself busy at something, find a hobby or join a fun run or triathlon sponsored by some energy drink or any product out there. Who knows you could find a marathon buddy or someone to keep you running after that.
If you’re in college and you’re studying a professional course, bombard yourself with a lot of reading not only the ones your professor provided.
Third is don’t watch or read love stories when you’re infatuated because watching romantic comedies and reading chick literature for girls are like taking drugs of a very high dose then you drink the strongest whiskey in your father’s mini bar at home.
It’s basically killing yourself if you ask me.
This is just when you’re infatuated. Single people who are not easily infatuated can still read chick lit or watch romantic comedies or just plain romantic movies and leave their feelings in the cinema or at home then play the next downloaded movie or DVD.
Now how do we differentiate infatuation from love?
ALL I CAN SAY IS RECIPROCATION SETS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN INFATUATION AND LOVE.
Everything should be two-way. Don’t give so much of your time, money and effort if a person does not return the favor because in the end, you will only end up feeling sorry for yourself like they say.
When you’re being reciprocated basically it’s the late night conversations whether you’re texting or chatting, the gifts, and the teasing that you get from friends. More important is mutual understanding and the attraction that comes along with it.
Just imagine a person who may not be the cutest or the hottest person in the room and the person attracted to that someone is a real head-turner. The attraction and the understanding are there for these people, the one thing that makes it love between them more than infatuation is the feelings expressed which like I said are reciprocated in any form. It may not be love to others but to me it is love.
Don’t over think. You just met the person. Keep yourself busy, enjoy life and don’t rush yourself in getting into a relationship. As Elvis once said in a song, only fools rush in but if you can’t help falling in love to someone then let her know gently of what you truly feel.